What I would do in the event of a zombie apocalypse...

So I've been recording my dreams for the last 6 months, and it has revealed something very interesting to me, on average, I have 3 zombie apocalypse dreams a week. I think you can agree with me that this is excessive, by any standards. So, for my own reassurance in the dreams, and for your interesting, I am writing here exactly what I have planned out in my head for this disastrous event. 

There I am, lying in my bed asleep, the sun shining down on me through the gap in my curtains. (There is ALWAYS a gap in curtains! Why is this?? Poor design no doubt.) But my innocent dreaming is disturbed by the sounds of screams and car crashes nearby. I get up and peer out of window to see the Post Office on fire, with zombie postmen streaming out of it and attacking innocent bystanders. The apocalypse has come.

Here's my plan: Upon realizing that Paul, Cath and James may already be dead (or worse) I would run to my wardrobe and wrench free the pole my clothes hung on. Sure it's not the best weapon in the world, but it would do in a pinch. 

I would then make my way downstairs, wielding my pole, and investigate the store room for a better weapon (shovel, baseball bat, something nice and blunt.) 

I'd get in my car and, where safety allowed it, search the houses of my loved ones for survivors, (The Boags, Boyfriend, Family etc.) I would also pay a visit to the gun shop in town (and/or camp) and equip myself.

The next stage would be to find a bigger car. Perhaps take my parent's people carrier, especially if I had other survivors with me. Then drive into Tescos (literally) and stock up on canned food, medicine and bottled water.

A long drive to Poole Quay would follow where I would steal a boat (Not a shitty houseboat, I'm talking about a ferry, or cruise liner.

I would set sail BEFORE clearing the ship of zombies, because that way no more can come on board, and sail south, to warm, tropical waters.

Perhaps after a while I would pull a Resi and broadcast to survivors my location and set up a little community on my cruise liner. I would also try to grow food on the deck, and find a water purifier for the sea water, (if the boat didn't already have one) Either way I think I could survive a long time on a boat, you don't really need to use the fuel, you could just drift, and then fire her up if you float too near to land, and you might even be able to get solar powered electricity on board. Paradise!