Things that shouldn't exist

I'm in one of those moods where I hate everything. Even inanimate objects. Where I feel like if they look at me funny I'll throw them across the room, or pour acid on them. I don't really know why I feel like this. I had a pretty big argument with someone important to me last night, but we made up and spent time together, and then I made up for the lost sleep today. Plus I saw friends and ate yummy food. So why am I so pissed off??? God knows. However in the meantime I'm going to write a list of things I hate. This may seem similar to my last post, but that was about celebs. This is broader ;)




Mushrooms

Rastafarian Death Mushrooms

Medusoid Mycelium

Most people have heard about my little.... err... problem. I'm Mycophobic, meaning I have an irrational and inexplicable fear of mushrooms and fungi. I have a few ideas where this could have originated from, such as the stoner mushrooms in The 10th Kingdom, that try to lure you to your death in cool Rasta voices, the Medusoid Mycelium in the Lemony Snicket Unfortunate Events books that grow in your throat and kill you, and my mother's threats in my childhood about drying off after a bath. Apparently if you don't dry everywhere, like under your knees and such, fungi will grow all over your body. I think she meant fungal infections etc but it had me freaked for a long time. Basically when I'm around mushrooms I get scared I'm going to inhale the spores, and that they will grow in my throat and choke/poison me to death... Crazy, I know, but I can't help it...




The Sound of People Chewing

What a Chump..

I absolutely HATE listening to people eat. Especially if they open their mouth a lot and it's all squelchy. Eurgh. I can't help being quietly disgusted by anyone who eats in my presence. Which isn't exactly fair as I'm no silent eater, (I'm one of those annoying people in the cinema who eats crunchy nachos) but it's nothing I can help. It's repulsive and before now it's put me off my food entirely. Sometimes food will even fall out of peoples mouthes, and you just DON'T KNOW WHERE TO LOOK. Eating should be done alone, in my opinion. 




The Dark

This picture pretty much sums my
life up...

I hate to admit I am little afraid of the dark... Still. Even up to the age of about 16-17 I had to have a bedside lamp most nights. I'm not sure why... Sometimes I even slept with my main ceiling light thingy on. I can deal with bright, harsh light, but not darkness. When the level of darkness reaches the stage where there is no difference between opening and shutting my eyes, I'm freaked. Nowadays I'm listening to stuff on my iPhone and the light from that suffices as I drift off to sleep, but it's pretty embarrassing at other peoples houses. With my boyfriend it's ok because I'm sharing a bed with him, but sleeping on the floor somewhere, spiders could be crawling all over me and I wouldn't see!!

While we're on the subject of sleep I also can't sleep with my back to my room/door incase monsters creep up on me in the night... Yeah, I'm that cool.




Slow Computers

Just don't forget to save...

Slow computers suck. And don't be under the misguided impression that macs are better. Macs are Windows with out Ctrl-Alt-Del. No matter how good your processor is, how many gigs of RAM you have, how few applications you have running, your computer can STILL CRASH. Yes, even your mac. We have a mac that takes a good 3-4 mins to open iTunes, and another minute or so to start playing a song or video. Admittedly it's linked to 2 Apple TVs and our laptops connect to the external hard drive through it, but still! 

These things are evil..

My Scales
For two reasons, A. you have to kick it really hard to turn it on, and B. it never shows me nice numbers :(








Velvet

Eurghhhh

I don't understand how anyone can stand let-alone enjoy the feeling of velvet. It literally sends shudders down my spine. It feels almost dry and moisture sucking, like some paper towels we had at my old job, (but don't get me started on those...) Personally I like whatever duvets are made of, and my tolerance of fabrics ends there.







Blu-ray

Fuck you, Blu-ray!

Blu-ray seems to me like nothing more than a chance to re-sell us films we already own, with a slightly different case, for ridiculous amounts of money. Ok so maybe for a film like Avatar there may be advantages to Blu-ray, but Pretty Woman? Wayne's World? How exactly can these films be improved? They weren't filmed in HD, and surely by increasing the resolution you're just making it look crappier. And the extract in-film special features don't exactly make it worth it. What's the point seeing as more and more people are moving straight from DVDs to downloads anyway? And being an avid collector of DVDs myself, I don't want to see the day that DVD players are as hard to obtain as VCRs...






How Un-Photogenic I Am

The day we decided to play with my
purple make-up set...

Seriously, have you seen pictures of me?! Ok I don't have a great complexion, and my nose is kinda big, but other than that I think I'm ok, yet in photos I look like I'm evil/drunk/have been hit by a car/having a bad hair day/contemplating murdering the person taking the picture/all of the above. It's not fair! Look at the picture of me and Bronni, she looks pretty, and I look like a man in a wig. My absurdly odd fringe seems to be in a battle with my nose over who can take up most of my face. :(